I promised myself that I would keep producing new pieces for this blog, not so much for the reader’s entertainment, but so that I could have an outlet to practice my writing. But for the last month or so I’ve been out of my element -a little bit absent-minded. I haven’t been able to tap into the creative well within my brain, or maybe I just drained it out already. Either way, I can’t seem to get ideas for writing. So I’ll share with you how I’ve been feeling lately.
There are two parts to me. I’m not talking about soul and spirit, or flesh and spirit. I am writing about the Sensible Man and the Beast. Many of you know me as analytical and cautious. It is true, I am. I over-think and I stay fixed on analyzing details as I replay events in my head over and over. I cannot help it, that is the nature of the Sensible Man within. But there is someone else that lives with him. There is a beast, his name is Beast, and he dwells deep within my own nature.
I think usually there is not a lot of disagreement between the Man and the Beast. The Beast himself is not very primal, which is why he has no problem letting the Man be the dominant influence in my character. But lately Man and Beast have not seen eye to eye. In fact, I feel as if the Sensible Man has had to lock the Beast up in order to keep him from doing things that the Sensible Man will not be able to fix. The Beast wants to act on emotion, he wants to act on desires, emotions and desires that are shared with the Sensible man.
So they want the same thing. They want what I want. The two creatures share in all the things I feel. But their approach to how I should deal with my ambitions are in contrast. For now, I will continue to let the Sensible Man have dominion. Reason is his instrument and he does the best he can with it. The Beast will have to wait his turn. When I’m ready, I will unleash him -although only because I know that even the Beast is sensible to a certain degree. Best case scenario: the two spheres of my character will learn to compliment each other. Then I might actually get things done right.